Sunday, January 8, 2012
What if... I/We walked away from A.A.?
Here you go Rob. Let's talk about this in all of its forms, shall we?
The only real experience I have with this is when I ... unknowingly at the time... picked a road out and went and drank booze.
But heck, I didn't need A.A. to blame for this because I did the same kind of thing when I "got sober" without A.A. in the past. I've gotten sober with and without A.A. with the full intent to never drink again, and went some time without booze and seemingly happy, content, etc. But the time came eventually where I drank for some seemingly trivial reason, a case of the fuck-its, the poor me's, etc.
I drank again because, I wanted to get laid and was nervous, because she left me, because I was offered a drink and somehow just said yes, because somebody stole my sale, because I was in California, because I was in Texas, because I "accidently" mistook rum and coke for coke, etc.
But what we're talking about here... is folks who do A.A. ... are sober and recovered in A.A. ... and just fed up with the goings on in the fellowship... or at whatever level they're fed up. Or maybe it's an internal thing.
But as RobB talks about, it's a matter of staying sober and continuing on a God-Centered path.
I brought up this notion... of "What if someone left A.A. and lead a God-centered life and stayed sober despite leaving A.A.?" at an after-A.A. diner get-together... and you'd a thought I ripped a fart during the wedding vows.
"WELL... I KNOW PLENTY OF PEOPLE WHO LEFT A.A. ALL THE ONE'S I KNOW OF ARE DRUNK, DEAD, OR LOCKED UP!" Pretty much something to that effect. One gal said she knew some who did that and either drank or she just don't see them anymore... despite the fact she relocated to a town 120 miles south of where she got sober.
I credit you folks... my colleagues I've met in cyber-recovery... and the anti/XAers... who opened my eyes to some of the head-knodding-droolery and hypnosis that we can choose into and hopefully out of.