How long do you have to quit before you can relapse? I quit at least once a week. By the end of the day I was drinking again. If I wasn't drinking by the end of the day it was a sign I was dead serious about quitting. I could drag it out to two days. But just like clockwork, there I was. Drinking again. There's times I managed to throw in a continuous week. These weeks were sincere hardcore attempts at quitting too. So the question is, what's the difference between relapsing and having never quit in the first place?
Some of the responses lead me to believe that we have some concerns as to what relapse is or isn't. Then some lead me to believe that some people can't read. Go scope out the responses I got and give me input as to the responses as well as the question I posed. I personally don't see how anyone gets sober using that resource.
Karl
Pinkdog told you that you should choose sobriety. Thank goodness you have that SR resource. These people will fix you.
ReplyDeleteAiko thinks you haven't quitted yet. You may need extra help.
Keep coming back to SR and use your Higher Power. One day at a time. Just keep going and you will get out. First thing's first. Think think think... through the drink. Let go and let God. Live and let live. Easy does it.
Oh, and... Let us love you until you can love yourself. Keep coming back. There's a baby in every bottle. Sick and tired of being sick and tired... Take what you want and leave the rest. Do the steps when you're comfortable. Get phone numbers. You can make it! We're betting on you.
Now I'd like to answer your question. I don't think that I can see anybody elses drinking but my own. We all drink differently but our drinking has been categorized. I drank hard and furious and it didn't take kong before I was disgusted in what I had done and what booze became for me.
ReplyDeleteI quit often. But no, it didn't last long though I had fully intended it to. I also was astounded looking back how nonchalantly I'd started again and how in control I thought I was.
I did not relapse. I fucking drank again, willfully. Some folks in my A.A. group saw it coming before I did and warned me that I was going to drink again and that it would hurt the group, was unacceptable and unnecessary.
This pissed me off so I told them to fuck off and that I would show them what staying sober was.
When I came back, they did not hug me. Only Gary would work with me. He works with chronic slippers and he doesn't fire anybody. He'll let you drink though, but first he'll tell you how you'll hurt the group.
But when you come back and are whipped by alcohol and ask him if he'll help you, he'll say "Yes. I will help you. We will help you. Get in. Write an inventory. Be done in 21 days. 5th step that immediately. It's up to you Bud. Either you're gonna do this stuff or your not. The ball is in your court. You are responsible."
It sure seems that nobody wants to touch that one. It might cause a few to have to look at themselves. The chronic slippers that relapse may have to face the fact that they never really quit. Maybe their "Slips" would turn out to be slaps of reality. You throw in something thought provocative and nobody knows how to handle it. I personally thought it was a fair and valid question. One that was worthy of discussion. It appears that a lot of them didn't even read the post or the post stating that I'd been sober for some time. One responded in disbelief. As if it was impossible. I suppose in that environment it would be.
ReplyDeleteThe biggest thing is that in those forums is that most all the OPs are problems. My problem of the day type of thing. Someone posts a path towards a solution and it stumps them. The conditioned response mode would have them salivating as Pavlov's Dog. Regardless of the post topic. It frightens me. If they all assumed I was drinking, where is their thought process leading them? To the drink. As the Book says, If you have an alcoholic mind the time and place will come that you will drink. That's an absolute fact.
You lead me to the dreaded "Alcoholism" subforum. I usually have tried to confine my lurking to the supposed "12 Step" subforum. I wonder how you would have neen rcvd in the "Newcomers" sub. Better yet, don't risk it.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like KeithJ is back. Haven't seen him post yet though.
I look at the 12 step forum in sheer horror. I want to start a post that says "Please Stay the Hell out of my Meetings". I'm trying to help people with the program and help people to get well. We have a club here that I stop in to from time to time. Just to make sure it's still a fucked up place to go. I have to keep in the loop. I've found that it holds true that you can't get well by osmosis. That we can all agree on. You can sure get sick by osmosis if you get caught off guard. Next thing you know is that I'll be out hugging people that "Relapse". Then they'll keep drinking just so they can get hugs and ball rubs every time they step out. It's a well thought out plan for the ones that are starved for the warmth and companionship of other sick people. I'm not on their Christmas Card list. Fortunately I know the difference between brutal honesty and rigorous honesty. Unfortunately the "Relapsers" don't like either.
ReplyDeleteAh Karl you're polluting my mind... making me read that stuff. At least in 12 step, there's 47 less assholes reading/viewing that stuff allegedly.
ReplyDeleteTo the gal who found a beer under her steps... drink it! Poke a hole in the bottom, insert mouth and lips, open lid, breathe. To the person who had their anonymity violated... for once, I agree with that blowhard Music. Anonymity is to protect A.A. from you two-hatter bitch.
Oh, imo of course.
Saw Don C, Tom U, Dick K, and Gary B at our Ocsoberfest in Pueblo this weekend. And heard Dick K's daughter from Louisiana give her pitch the other night.
Daytrader had a pretty good response in that anonymity thread too, for an ex-chronic slipper.
ReplyDeleteI'm not entirely sure I agree with Music on that one. Personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films protects AA. Breaking the anonymity someone else only allows the ignorant and misinformed general public to attach a stigma to a person. Some newcomers still see themselves as stigmatized and may withdraw from the program. That's the newcomers who are still in AA for themselves which in time will go away. Assuming that things go as planned. If someone is in AA and their main focus is still on themselves and their sobriety they need to be taken to another room and have a few principles explained to for their better understanding of the program and how things are supposed to work. Moving on to the ranks of the “Recovered” they should know that they're of no benefit to an alcoholic if nobody knows that this person is available for help.
ReplyDelete