Current post on SoberRecovery now; what do you believe is the most important message to pass along to the newcomer in AA

If I had a shot at a newcomer in an A.A. meeting?

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I'd first ask them what brings them to A.A. Do you think you have a drinking problem? If so, why? Maybe you do or maybe you don't. Do you know what an alcoholic is? Do you know what a non-alcoholic is? Maybe search what a variety of sources says about the subject and get your own feel for what these terms really mean.

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If it turns out you're not alky, please run from A.A. as fast as you can!

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Maybe there's no such thing as the term Alcoholic. Maybe we're all wrong. Maybe in time, we'll all laugh at this.

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Don't let anyone hustle you into A.A.

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If you are an alcoholic, what do you want to do about it? Do you want to quit for good and all? If so, maybe give A.A. a try. Do you have reservations about God? Are you open minded about the whole thing. Are you religious? Would a church or other affiliation serve you? Are you not willing to consider a Higher Power? If not, maybe you should run away from A.A. now.

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Are you willing to read the proposals of the A.A. program and decide for yourself all down the line, are you willing to do this right now and for the rest of your life?

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Are you willing to decipher all of the Middle-of-the-Road Treatment Center crap which has infiltrated A.A. and other recovery processes and find out what is true and what is not?

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Do you want to live? Do you want to succeed in life and take full responsibility of your own life from this second on?

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Boy, if that don't run them off, I don't know what else would. That's what I think I would tell them. Maybe I ought to look into a new avocation. I'm into home improvement and grilling right now. I'd better stick to that for a while.

The Horror and Shame of meeting A.A. people on the street...

A.A. dude: How are you doing, McGowdog? I haven't seen you in a loooooong time! :)

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Me: I'm good. And you?

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A.A. fellow : I'm FANTASTIC! Haven't seen you around for a loooooooooong time! :)

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Me: Well go bleep yourself bleephole! Srsly though... so I lie! How bleeping pathetic is that? I have to resort to a lie! I say, "Well bleephole... no srsly, I say, "Well D... ude, I've not seen YOU in MY homegroup meeting on MONDAY ever!"

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This is all to just get him off my back. So why can't I just say, "Oh, well D...ude, I've quit A.A. I just don't go anymore."

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I couldn't muster the words. I didn't have the heart. I'm just chicken-bleep.

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So he says, "So, how are YOU doing? Really?

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BLEEP you bleeping bleephole. I'm doing fine, FANbleepingTASTIC, bleephole! I'M DOING BETTER THAN bleepING YOU BleepDAMNIT!

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BleepoHOLICS ANONYMOUS!

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BLEEP YOU ALL.

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:)

Freedom! My observations of life after... A.A.

Well it hasn't been that long yet.

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I'm still sober.  I still don't want to drink.  I don't have to drum up what I've been doing the last week to impress upon the world my relentless pursuit of perfection of working the A.A. steps.

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I have been asked so politely to come back to the group or invited to holiday things etc., etc.

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These folks were/are in fact, my friends as well.  But minus the commitment, where do I really stand?  We shall see.

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So, what does this new found freedom feel like?  It's nice, to not have to eat sleep and breathe A.A. shit for a while.  I can spend time with the wife.  Spend time with my aging parents.  Spend time with my home, my back yard, my kitchen floor, my new hot water heater that I installed, just like the new kitchen floor, my soon to be back yard improvements, my old car restoration, my T.V.!  That's right!  I've finished off House of Cards, gotten three seasons into Damages, etc.

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Freedom to just live... my life, the way I want to.  I don't have to give a damn about what an alcoholic is or is not or whether that dude or chick has the same beliefs or A.A. knowledge that I do.  They don't give a damn about my meticulous studies of the A.A. doctrine that I've slaved over the last 21 or so years.

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It feels so good to just chill for a while.