Today was 2 years since my last drink. I went to the AA I used to go to get my 2 year coin.(last time I was there was for my 1 year coin).
I couldn't believe it. There were only 5 of us there. 3 were court ordered and needed their papers signed and the guy chairing the meeting was moving in a couple weeks. When the meeting was over he left like a scalded cat. I guess someone will come by and lock the door,but that's just a guess.
AA got the monkey off of my back,and I wouldn't have made it without the people that used to go there a year ago. There used to be 15 or 20 people there every night. I don't know what happened. If I would have walked in to see this 2 years ago I would have left before the meeting was over. I was in total disbelief.
The point I am trying to make is if you are new to AA and aren't sure if it's for you or not. If you have more than one in your neighborhood check them all out.
I wouldn't have made it with the current AA group.
I plan on calling someone tomorrow to see whats going on.
Then upon further inspection... I see we have a troll on our hands; Jim, is this the "faker" you warned us about?
Well the reason I quit going is I am far from a poster child for the AA model.
I did try to work the steps, but I never have gotten past 4. The last was my 3rd stretch to AA, and 3rd stretch of any length sobriety.
I think the main thing I got out of it was a lot of other people also trying to be sober. But in reality,looking back I didn't try very hard at the steps.
With 2 years sober it is likely someone could ask me to be their sponsor. If that were to happen I would have to say no because I have never had a sponsor myself,and didn't really do it with the steps. Not setting a very good example. But that is what was so kool about the group. Nobody pushed anybody into anything unless they asked for it.
I did talk to a guy that used to go there today. He said he hadn't been there in quite a while either, but 2 of the 4 main "mentors" moved away and membership had fallen way off. Iduno there was a flier on the wall for a cookout 2 weekends away. I plan on going to see who is there. I didn't really plan on not going for a whole year,but that's what happened.
I feel one thing for sure, my sobriety was more secure than anyone else at the meeting last night. But I also feel a couple of the court ordered attendees went straight to the liquor store after the meeting.
Fred
This is Classic and embodies all I detest about MOTR AA.
ReplyDeleteI have written a lot of inventory on folks who sweep into AA once a year with their entourage to pick up their medalion. They say "it's to show people this program does work". I call bullshit.
It's because you are a selfish self centered fuck. How do you think groups survive,the newcomer is the life blood, but blood needs a heart. Those who stay in the trenches and do the work are this heart. On a side note, I'm glad this guy isn't sponsoring anyone.
This poster is either retarded, completely asleep, or a troll. Reminds me of a story I heard. A guy celebrating 22 years got a call from the hotline to do a 12th step call. He declined because he was receiving his medallion that evening. Unbelievable.
Here is the opposite of Fred:
ReplyDeleteI Stand at the Door
By Sam Shoemaker (from the Oxford Group)
I stand by the door.
I neither go to far in, nor stay to far out.
The door is the most important door in the world -
It is the door through which men walk when they find God.
There is no use my going way inside and staying there,
When so many are still outside and they, as much as I,
Crave to know where the door is.
And all that so many ever find
Is only the wall where the door ought to be.
They creep along the wall like blind men,
With outstretched, groping hands,
Feeling for a door, knowing there must be a door,
Yet they never find it.
So I stand by the door.
The most tremendous thing in the world
Is for men to find that door - the door to God.
The most important thing that any man can do
Is to take hold of one of those blind, groping hands
And put it on the latch - the latch that only clicks
And opens to the man's own touch.
Men die outside the door, as starving beggars die
On cold nights in cruel cities in the dead of winter.
Die for want of what is within their grasp.
They live on the other side of it - live because they have not found it.
Nothing else matters compared to helping them find it,
And open it, and walk in, and find Him.
So I stand by the door.
Go in great saints; go all the way in -
Go way down into the cavernous cellars,
And way up into the spacious attics.
It is a vast, roomy house, this house where God is.
Go into the deepest of hidden casements,
Of withdrawal, of silence, of sainthood.
Some must inhabit those inner rooms
And know the depths and heights of God,
And call outside to the rest of us how wonderful it is.
Sometimes I take a deeper look in.
Sometimes venture in a little farther,
But my place seems closer to the opening.
So I stand by the door.
There is another reason why I stand there.
Some people get part way in and become afraid
Lest God and the zeal of His house devour them;
For God is so very great and asks all of us.
And these people feel a cosmic claustrophobia
And want to get out. 'Let me out!' they cry.
And the people way inside only terrify them more.
Somebody must be by the door to tell them that they are spoiled.
For the old life, they have seen too much:
One taste of God and nothing but God will do any more.
Somebody must be watching for the frightened
Who seek to sneak out just where they came in,
To tell them how much better it is inside.
The people too far in do not see how near these are
To leaving - preoccupied with the wonder of it all.
Somebody must watch for those who have entered the door
But would like to run away. So for them too,
I stand by the door.
I admire the people who go way in.
But I wish they would not forget how it was
Before they got in. Then they would be able to help
The people who have not yet even found the door.
Or the people who want to run away again from God.
You can go in too deeply and stay in too long
And forget the people outside the door.
As for me, I shall take my old accustomed place,
Near enough to God to hear Him and know He is there,
But not so far from men as not to hear them,
And remember they are there too.
Where? Outside the door -
Thousands of them. Millions of them.
But - more important for me -
One of them, two of them, ten of them.
Whose hands I am intended to put on the latch.
So I shall stand by the door and wait
For those who seek it.
'I had rather be a door-keeper
So I stand by the door.
Yeah he's pretty kewl for a Hitler Lover.
ReplyDeleteOh wait... scratch that. I was thinking of somebody else.
ReplyDeleteYeah that somebody else was Frank Buchman, founder of the Oxford Group. Buchman gave an interview that appeared that he was pro-Nazi. That was one of the deciding factors in Shoemaker's break with him and the Oxford Group.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I don't think that the poster is neither retarded nor a troll. I believe he is for real, as I hear this kind of stuff in meetings.
ReplyDeleteWhether they need A.A. or not, some refuse to leave. Good thing this one doesn't come by much. Absence makes the heart grow fonder...not!
ReplyDeleteCarolD must have sterilized the thread. A bunch seems to have been removed or something.
Well I just dropped a comment in my never ending endeavor to get the boot.
ReplyDeleteEasy grizzly. You're guilty by association.
ReplyDeleteAnybody up for a blast from the past? For those of you poor souls who still have access over to SR... go to the 10th Step subforum and look up one of my two threads on there. There's a classic battle between myself, Ago, Keith, RobB... a juicy argument... then we sort of hugged it out and made up. Now THAT was back in the good old days at SR.
Ah, the good old SR days, I can't access the site from my laptop anymore, it's probably for the best.
ReplyDeleteI have been checking out Danny's blog, looks like you've made a new friend Patrick. Good deal, I wish all my friends were 26 years sober. LOL funny shit.
Not so funny, a blizzard is currently going on outside, Awesome April 1st day here in New England.
Every once in a great while I get an email from an SR member. Apparently they can still email me. Usually it is someone wanting help with a fourth step or something. So, even though we are banned we still make an impact.
ReplyDeleteI saw that classic battle that Patrick refers to some time ago. I fondly recall my first communication with the Dog as he asking me something like "who the fuck are you, asshole? the SR enforcer?" or words to that effect.
ReplyDeleteAll the old stuff is still on there, even someone PMing Patrick only to be told that he's no longer a member of SR.
Looks like the Cuda, Rob, and I are the only ones left (that I can find). And I'm on super secret probation.
From : CarolD
ReplyDeleteTo : McGowdog
Date : 2009-11-04 10:13
Title : Private Message from CarolD
-------------------------------------------Hi patrick....
I removed this post of yours
from the thread Purdy started
in our Alcoholism 12 Step Support
Forum
[QUOTE] hear that Lois had more to reveal about Willie than he ever did. Hmmm... I wonder if she didn't feel a little like Hillary at times... [/QUOTE]
I removed it as you referred to
Hillary which has nothing to do
with the topic of AA founders.
The 2nd one on the same thread
I removed as it made no sense
wth out the first.
If you feel it's important to discuss Lois and Bill's marriage you may repost.
However....
I can't see anyone would benefit
from it.
Let's both enjoy another blessed day
:)
From : CarolD
To : McGowdog
Date : 2009-11-25 11:42
Title : Private Message from CarolD
-----------------------------------
Hi.....
I removed this post of yours
[QUOTE]Chronic masturbation and inbreeding if you ask me[/QUOTE]
It has nothing to do with the topic
and is insulting
Please do respect others when sharing.
Thanks
Carol D-Forum Leader
From : CarolD
To : McGowdog
Date : 2009-11-28 13:56
Title : Private Message from CarolD
-----------------------------------
Hi Patrick.....:)
I moved yyour tradition thread
to our main page.
It's a good idea but clearly is not
about Steps. ...which is the sub forum.
Hope you get lots of shares
on tradition 1.
Private Message from CarolD
Hi...
I just removed your post from the"Question" thread to biddy.
I had already given her the info
she had replied....
the thread had moved on...
your post was redundant.
Hope all is well in your world Patrick
Re: Private Message from CarolD
Hmm...
I really do think your reply was un necessary
I did just now post a Welcome to all 3 of
our newer members.
It's not at all unusual for members to feel upset....especially when they are not familiar
to Discussion Boards.
note her reply about a lack of
response on another Forum to her
thread on cooking.
Anyway...she has the info up to her
how to use it....:yup:
Patrick.....
because of some of your posts
on the thread that I closed in our
Alcoholism 12 Step Support forum
were in violation of.....[QUOTE]From our SR Policy Rules and Posting Forum
4. No Flaming: Posting of any content … blah blah blah
[/QUOTE]
and you have been warned several times
you may consider this your final warning.
All members are expected to follow our
SR Policies Rules and Guidelines.
If you find this too constrictive
perhaps SR is not the site for you.
Carol D-Forum Leader
ReplyDeleteHi....
I removed a post of yours from
Alcoholism. Please do take into
consideration the member you are
sharing with.
The OP did split with her AH
3 weeks ago.
She is somewhere in Europe
where there is no Al anon
English is her 2nd language
so it's more difficult for communication
between the 2 of you.
She is useng our forums for support
not to answer questions
It never hurts to be gentle to those
in trouble. If you have no experience
on the situation....please leave the
thread and member alone.
Thanks
Carol D -SR Forum Leader
Here is what I removed
It is rude and accusatory:
McGowdog
“Where in the world did I say I was offended? On the contrary.
So... he's not the same guy you met? You had no clue he had a drinking problem before you had children with him?
Him not being excused of being a responsible father because he's an alky I agree with. But him not being a good father because he's a practicing alky, I'm not surprised about... one bit.
So he's stuck and you're affected very negatively over his actions. It's his fault. He's guilty. He really is. But this doesn't mean your life has to end here. You can get free of him totally and completely if you really want and need to. He doesn't have to change a bit for you to get free.
You were once a victim, but you know the situation now. Now you're responsible for you and your child/children. You're the boss. You don't need alanon to decide to remove yourself from the situation and be free of him forever and you can become responsible to what's left of your family and that's your greatest position of hope. You may need help from friends/family/strangers/clergy/etc., but you can get free of him.
If you put your dependency on his recovery, I just don't know. If you can detach from him and cut all ties from him and see if he responds and recovers, that would be nice. But had you drawn up some boundaries way back before you got serious with him, maybe you could have avoided this or could avoid it in the future.
Surely he didn't become an alcoholic under your nose, right?”
CarolD
Forum Leader
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Dallas, Ga. USA
Posts: 25,067
Alike.....
McGowdog is no longer a member of SR
so he will not be answering your post.
You responded to an old thread.
To check how current the topics are
please look on the top over the user name.
Welcome to SR....
__________________
Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
"Each Day is a sober victory'
ReplyDeleteYEAH US!!!
Patrick Ole doggie,
ReplyDeleteI know Keith from SR I got into it with him on the chat site during a on-line meeting he was chairing. The spat happened as a side bar (PM).
I can't remember exactly but I felt the subject he asked us to share on was far above all the new comers heads and 99% were new. So I spoke up in a meeting by (PM). He ignored me at first, so I Pm'ed him again and he came back with some snarky shit. Well I politely asked him again to change the topic because at this point it was just a Keith speaker meeting.
Well he just came back we a shitty response and basically told me if I did not like it leave. I did buit not without saying a few more words in a PM.
This was my experience over last summer with Keith. If I am talking about the same Keith.
What a stroll down memory lane, Thank God Carol D is there to regulate information, reminds me of our government.
ReplyDeleteJoe, I am a member of the exclusive banned from SR Club, I rejoined a few times under fake names and alias. My last avatar was the one I currently use on this site, Hannibal Lecter ( I have a warped sense of humor). I received a PM from Caro D, saying having a canibal psychopath as ana avitar was not in the spirit of good taste and out of respect for members she was deleting it. I still laugh over this. At this point I realized that that site was a waste of my time. That any truth would be censored.
Onward we go, side by side,,, Carol, blow it out your ass, you are harming more people than I ever dreamed of.
I always liked Keith, probably because I agreed with him.
Yeah, we know Keith. I've come to see him as a solid member... as well as Puddy.
ReplyDeleteSo... without our Joe and Cuda laying in the weeds, and those other two ... SR would be pretty lost. It is lost anyway as I know from exerience how hard it is to get a good thread started over there and a little bit of friction and heat to keep it going. We don't want to make anybody feel uncomfortable, especially the poor poor new hopeless alcoholc or alanon. Life is just puppies and lollypops and blowjobs.
Now... there's a few others over there I have come to respect and would like to converse with again... Boleo, Tomvlle, Mark, Freya, Laura, Barb Dwyer, Sugah, SugErspun, Trucker, and several other diamonds in the rough. Ago... my favorite on again off again brother in recovery... we finally became good friends and understanding of each other I think. We sure had our differences though.
But what about the folks we don't "get with" so much? Like ... 24Hours, Music, bugsworth-ooh... I just puked in my mouth a little bit when I typed that... oh... and my hat's off to the biggest Troll in the history of SR... KeepComingBack!
01-13-2010, 10:42 PM #73 (permalink)
keepcominback
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Western Skyline
Posts: 176
What a night I am having, I am still not touching that box of wine in the laundry room, it is more than half full. The thought to have some will pop up, but I know I will wind up drinking too much, and feeling badly tomorrow morning, and that plus all I have been through over the last month of drinking again, is starting to not make sense
for me.
Then with the frothy emotional appeal... "Oh, please Keep... please please please, for God's Sake!!! Throw the wine out!"
Then there's me;
01-13-2010, 11:36 PM #77 (permalink)
McGowdog
On Double Secret Probation
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Southern Colorado
Posts: 1,275 Quote:
Originally Posted by keepcominback
"What a night I am having, I am still not touching that box of wine in
the laundry room, it is more than half full. The thought to have some
will pop up..."
You know what they say
There's a baby in every box.
...
That went over like a fart in church.
Something just occured to me while looking at some of those old posts and partially deleted threads... SoberRecovery removed 101 of my posts between the time I got banned and now.
ReplyDeleteI had 1275 at the time we had it out in that final battle with bw and my current talley on my remaining posts is 1174. I do know they removed my story from the "My Story" section.
I shouldn't even be allowed to see anything in the forums, but I have a server I can log onto from my old work and I can go in undetected. I typically check it out about once a week but lately, it's been funny.
"Now... there's a few others over there I have come to respect and would like to converse with again... Boleo, Tomvlle, Mark, Freya, Laura, Barb Dwyer, Sugah, SugErspun, Trucker, and several other diamonds in the rough."
ReplyDeleteLet me remove Sugah from there and replace that with someone else... I meant to put Pagekeeper. That's the one who I would have related to... from a program standpoint. There was once a gal named Cheryl85 or something like that... that PMed me in the beginning... but not so much after things got wild.
Sorry Rob, I had seen you on a recent post, but failed to note that it was dates 2007.
ReplyDeleteI like Kieth too, but haven't had any personal one on ones with him. He's pretty solid in what he says.
A new up and comer in my book is FrothyJay. He's only been around for a month or two but so far what he's been saying is right on. No bullshit.
Charmie is another one I like to read, as well as TomVIII and Daytrader. No kid gloves with any of their posts.
So there's still hope out there. Just a matter of time before they get burned out or thrown out. Cuda and I will stay in the weeds as long as we can.
I have managed to connect with a few of these folks away from SR. sugErspun, Ago, Emily, Pagekeeper, and a few others I've connected with on FaceBook. Talked on the phone a while back with Pagekeeper. She is a neat lady.
ReplyDeletePuddy lives in Seattle, he was up at my house last weekend.
ReplyDeletePuddy is the name of his cat.
ReplyDeleteYup. Pussy got whacked. So did everyone else.
ReplyDeleteOops. Those dorks at ST are gonna say we're talking porn again in their "neverending thread".
TJ, if you're within earshot, they miss you over at ST;
""Mr AA says “If anyone’s interested, there’s a pic of Tony J. on McGowGod’s blog. Scroll down to pic dated FRIDAY, MARCH 25, 2011. Sitting in a car before a meeting or something. I’m in a frivolous mood”
@ mike / mike augustine
Wow! I must admit to being a little jealous. I thought I was the object of your obsession. Or maybe it was “Extravagant Challenge.” I am still at ……if you are looking for a clandestine tryst. At least a dozen ST posters have not been afraid to contact me at that address.
If this is your first time, then I promise I will be gentle, you frivolous little sweetheart.
Mr AA""
Well den Jimbo, it is "Puddy Dat" den!!!!
ReplyDeleteI've got to get to work on more material for here, then trying to talk like I am on Warner Bros. cartoons.
ReplyDeleteLOL
ReplyDelete